How Much Charity Are We Obligated to Give the Poor Person?

In today's "Random Torah" post, we take a look at the actual obligation of giving. How much is one required to give to others? Granted, people need. Granted we have to consider the other when we give. He may need water. He may need food. He may need clothing. He may need shelter. He may need a car to get around in. There are all sorts of necessities that those who don't have might actually need. But, be that as it may, how much are we actually obligated to give the other. We take a look at a ruling in the Rambam to find out the Psak Halachah - the definitive halachic ruling as ruled by the Rambam.

Children From Divorced Homes and Halachah

By Rabbi Yair Hoffman for the Five Towns Jewish Times

(Posted on this site with permission)

Their mothers live among us and are relatively invisible. They have children who have no one to take them to shul. They have no one to take them to father & son learning programs. Rarely do they get a Shabbos meal invitation. Their social lives are awkward at best.

They are the divorced women who live in our communities – a group whose numbers are growing dramatically. And true, there are fantastic people – the Rabbi Dovid Greenblatts, the Rabbi Yaakov Benders, the Dov Wolowitzs of the world, and others, but somehow it is not enough.They bear an almost unbearable burden. Most are financially insecure and have their hands full just making it through the week. Often they experience such legal strains and financial stress that the strongest among would buckle under the pressure.

THE HALACHA

What does halacha say about these women and their plight? The psukim in the Torah tell us about orphans, widows and converts. But what about the growing number of divorcees? And if, in fact, the answer is that we should devote more resources to this invisible group.

A few years ago, one such woman approached a number of Gedolim in Eretz Yisroel about the plight of divorcees an obtained a remarkable letter. Because there was a slight factual miscommunication in the recipient of the letter – there was a delay in the publication. The three Gedolim? Rav Aron Leib Shteinman Shlita, Rav Chaim Kanievsky Shlita, and l’havdil – Rav Michel Yehuda Lefkowitz zt”l. The letter is translated below:

To the Honorable Organization..

We have heard of the remarkable acts of chessed that you do with widows, rachmana litzlan, in a most befitting manner. Now you approach with a question in regard to divorced women:

Do they have the same a similar halachic status in regard to Tzedaka and in the manner in which to deal with them on an equal basis?

Our opinion is that the circumstances and situations are equal in their importance.

May the Holy One Blessed Be He enable you to continue in your blessed handiwork.

One who signs with wishes of blessing,

[Rav] Michel Yehudah Lefkowitz, Bnei Brak 5769 [zt”l]

We too join with what has been mentioned above,

[Rav] A.L. Shteinman

[Rav] Chaim Kanievsky

A FAMOUS PASUK WHOSE MEANING FEW UNDERSTAND

There is a pretty famous verse in the Torah whose true meaning has eluded the vast majority of people – Zeh Kaili v’Anveihu. Most people only understand it to mean that when it comes to items involving a Mitzvah, we should spend to buy the fancier and better one.

We see from the Gemorah in (Shabbos 133b) an entirely different explanation of it. Rav Yitzchok Isaac Sherr zatzal explains (Leket Sichos Mussar p.76) that the pasuk of “Zeh Kaili v’Anveihu” teaches us the obligation of feeling and understanding that the performance of Chessed brings us closer to Hashem.

This is on account of the Gemorah’s understanding of the word “Anvehu” to mean “Ani v’hu – I and Him.” The meaning of this Pasuk is therefore, “This is my G-d, and I shall bind myself to Him. I know that I can accomplish this binding through the notion of performing acts of Chessed.” The consequences of this particular Pasuk are an obligation of thought: It is something that we must think – Chessed binds us to Hashem – Ani VeHu.

The existence of this group of people then, provides us with an opportunity similar to that of a shul. What is one of the main purposes of davening? It is to form a close bond with Hashem. Chessed does the same thing, and according to this Gemorah in Shabbos – it is a halachic obligation of thought to realize this.

MAKE THEM FEEL AS A PERSON AND NOT CHESSED

One very important point that we must have in mind is that it is the greatest chessed for chessed not to be done as if it is chessed. All people have what to contribute, in conversation and in social activity. Our obligation is to realize that everyone is created B’Tzelem Elokim in the image of Hashem and that there is depth to who they are as people. Their social contribution, their thoughts and opinions matter and they are enjoyable company.

There was a famous bakery owner in Williamsburg. Mr. Gelb, who not only gave needy people Challah and cake for Shabbos and Yom Tov, but also gave them change so that their self-esteem would remain intact. An even higher level that can sometimes be achieved is to actually render any assistance in such a manner that even we do not detect or perceive it as chessed per se.

PRACTICAL STEPS

So, practically, what does this mean? We can help in two ways. Boruch Hashem one of our askanim, Rabbi Dovid Greenblatt has created an excellent organization called, “Sister to Sister.” This organization is a remarkable way in which one can lend assistance to this invisible group.

A second way, however, is to seek out members of this invisible group and actively help them. Boruch Hashem, some of these divorcees have an ex that cares enough about his children to provide for them even more than the court-mandated child support. Others often get a pittance and some not even at all.

MEN TOO

We must also not forget that divorced men, as well, need to be welcomed in our homes and need emotional support and assistance. Often men are perceived as the evil ones when, in fact, they too have suffered enormously. Whatever happened in a marriage is not our concern. Ahavas Yiroel and Chessed must be applied to all parties – these Mitzvos are gender neutral.

TZNIUS

When helping them, it should, of course, be done in the most tznius manner as possible, and with the contributions of both the husband and wife. There are many ways to do this. It should also be done in a manner where they do not feel that you are doing it as a chessed.

• Learn with the child

• Notice kids in shul

• Offer to take the children out with yours on an outing

• Help keep up with the homework

• Shabbos invitations – realize that often their families cannot take them back

• Extend invitations earlier rather than later

• Occasional financial help or a gift

• Offer to babysit once a month

• Ask if they need anything at Costco

• Offer to build them a Sukkah – or to use yours

• Ask in general, “Is there anything specific I can do for you?”

• Just call to say hello

• Share your husband’s flowers with her

• Get to know their favorite food items and that of their children

• Suggest shidduchim when possible and appropriate

• Suggest shidduchim for their children

• Help them deal with fixing the house

• Help them deal with fixing their car

• Help them deal with the IRS

• Help them in general negotiations

• Help them ensure that their kids have friends

• Sheitels – look out for a new one for them.

• Avoid avoiding them

• Don’t be judgmental

• Don’t stigmatize

• Don’t say things in a pitying way

• Be sensitive to call them back

• Avoid saying insensitive things or asking insensitive questions

LOVING CHESSED

The posuk in Micha (6:8) states, “..What does Hashem require of you? Merely to do justice and love Chessed..” The idea is that we must foster and develop a love of Chessed. Rav Sherr explains that there are three elements to this love:

1] To love doing acts of Chessed ourselves.

2] To love and appreciate a situation where Chessed is being performed by others – either for another or for others.

3] To love the existence of opportunities for Chessed in the world.

The Chofetz Chaim writes (Ahavas Chessed 2:1) that not only must one love Chessed but one must stick to this character trait and always go beyond the measure of what is required. He give the analogy of a parent. A loving parent gives more food and clothing than the child requires, so too must we do likewise in sticking to the Midah of Chessed.

CONCLUSION

The dramatic rise in divorces provides us all with an unprecedented opportunity for chessed. These opportunities should be done, when possible, with the utmost consideration and thought for their self-esteem and self-perception. These are the sons and daughters of Avrohom Avinu, Yitzchok Avinu, and Yaakov Avinu, and should be treated in lie with their stature.

The author can be reached at yairhoffman2@gmail.com

Why is it So Hard for the Poor Man to Ask for Help?

There are some powerful lessons in this week's Parshah - Behar (/Bechukotai). One of the most powerful teachings of the Torah appears in this week's portion - speaking about the importance of charity to others. 

Those who have seen a "beggar" (a term which strips a human being from all his dignity) often wonder how it can come about that a person should "lower" themselves to such a state. How did they get there? - people ask. They see the man lying on the ground with an old blanket around him. In front of him lies a plastic cup or a dish - practically empty, save for a few kind donations of the smallest of coins. 

Here lies a human being, but he has lost hope in life. What ever brought him to this? He tries to sleep as much as he can - just to pass the time until perhaps he will die... He waits for enough money to collect in the dish with the hope that he will be able to afford a loaf of bread and a glass of water - if he is lucky. It may take the entire day for this to happen - as passersby visit the most expensive of clothing shops / cellphone shops / "collectables" shops - and other "necessary" stores near to the man lying on the ground - on the list for the day, where the most vital of things should be purchased.

Our Parshah tells us the story. It once happened that here was a man filled with dignity. He was clean, smelled good, had a smile - and even laughed at things in life. Believe it or not - a human being - just like us! He must have given something to society at some point in time. It is just inconceivable that he did not. That is just how life works. As Ben Azzai in Pirkei Avot (4:3) teaches: "Despise no man, for there is no man who does not have his hour and no man who does not have his place."

This dignified man got along with life - moving and trying to do whatever he could. As time went on, he was not supported by others in the work and effort that he did. People did not buy from him. People did not hire his service. People would bargain with the man to get the service and goods he provided at bargain prices - often smiling to their relatives when they left - remarking at the good deal they had got! He continued on. Not much later he was unable to purchase new garments for himself. He could not even afford a new pair of spectacles he was much in need of! 

He felt it better to try to get some business - even at a loss - rather than to beg and ask others for help. With time, he could not even have a shower - because he could not afford to rent an apartment. Owning one - was not even something that appeared in his dreams... His diet - though once healthy - progressed to buying the barest minimum - eventually settling for just one meal a day (perhaps.) People began to detest the man, feeling he did not look good (now), he smelled bad. Why should they support him?! He had become a liability to society now. Why - he didn't even pay his taxes!

And then it happened. He gave up. He gave up on himself. He gave up on society. He gave up on life. Right there and then, he took the only blanket he had left, together with his last plastic cup - and he sat himself down on a business thoroughfare road somewhere. There were thousands of people walking by every day. Maybe someone would help. Really help! Get him on his feet again! Get him out of the debt he now owed... But the people walk by. They can only see a "beggar" - someone who does not contribute to society in any way. Why should anybody really take an active interest in his life? After all, three are considered dead anyway, the poor, the childless and the blind (Nedarim 64b). The poor man (and anyone who is this - knows well this feeling) is literally the walking dead.

The Torah is sensitive. There should never be a situation of a person having to become a "beggar". Let him become a professional, a person who is able to take care of himself (See Rambam's hierarchy of laws of charity - with the highest level being to give in order to help the other to be able to support himself.) Here is a person with talents and skills - and a soul... A person who can make a difference to others. But today - he sits with a cup in front of him because he has given up, because he may well never have even been given a chance!

Here the Torah teaches us - when we see the other falling - even before he stretches out his hand to ask - step in, make the difference to him NOW(!) before it is too late. When we give when the other is still stable - but in need - we do far better than when we give when the other has already fallen. Then... then it becomes practically impossible to get him up again. His dignity has been destroyed. His life's possessions have been taken away from him. The banks have closed his accounts, never to allow him to open them again(!)... His name has been ruined! The donkey has fallen / the load has fallen. It has become impossible to ever get it up again...

So many people walk around saying they are "good people". Many say how much they can relate to the man-man commandments, though they don't believe in God's commandments. Here is one of the ultimate tests. Here - we are faced with a person who seems - in our eyes - to be someone who is worth nothing (God forbid). So much so, we feel it is *his* duty to take care of himself - to get a job (whatever line we want to use - to let us off the hook from helping the other.) But now - we must come to the rescue and help the other - no matter what. We just cannot let them fall - because then... then, it will be too late. Too little... too late...

For those who don't know, I personally support myself only through Torah teaching on this site and my main site www.lovingkindness.co. It is not easy to find people willing to pay the amounts I need in order to live(!) and really, I too rely upon those who value Torah teaching and outreach - to help me to continue my own path in life. I am also a professional photographer (some of my pictures - for sale - can be seen here). People can purchase those photos - or hire me as their photographer for photography in Jerusalem. If you have valued any of my posts - please consider helping me to progress in the path I have chosen for myself, so that I too may never collapse like the load of a donkey.

There are donate buttons on this page as well as my main website. Please let others know. Share this post with others who may be able to offer help in any way.

Eliyahu Shear

Rabbi, author and editor, photographer, graphic designer - so much to offer...

Charity - And The Agony of Debt

There's no need to jump on the "it's coming to Rosh HaShanah" bandwagon to speak of the importance of Tzedakah - charity. The Chumash (Bible), Talmud, Codes of Jewish Law and just about every other major work in Jewish "folklore" and mysticism speak about this Mitzvah. From the wisest of all men (King Solomon), the message comes out clear and strong, "Charity saves from death" (Proverbs 11:4). In fact just typing the word צדקה (Tzedakah) in Hebrew into a search engine brings up the remainder of these words as its first choice for suggested pages צדקה תציל ממות!

This isn't a post about the benefits of Tzedakah. It's a post about debt. There's a synonym for it which simply does not appear in any thesaurus; it seems it can only be used in one direction for synonym purposes of course. It is "agony." The person in debt takes a look around the world in day to day events. He sees others embarking on extravagant holidays, purchasing new cars (regularly), purchasing dream homes (which are often not lived in save for once a year for just a week - as is so often the case in large amounts of apartments purchased in the most expensive areas in Israel.) I'm not talking about the person in debt due to his drug habit. Nor about the person in debt because of his gambling habit. I'm talking about those who struggle every month to make it through. I'm talking about those who - comes the day before their rent payment is due for their most modest apartment, wonder how they are going to get enough to pay that amount due in 24 hours.

The stress is agonizing! The will to continue living - overbearing. The image of the cruel landlord from years ago who would throw their tenants into prison for not paying rent is not just a past event. The renter of today - the one in debt - fears every day of the possibility of finding his treasured few personal possessions to be on the street come the next month. His dream of owning his own home is a fantasy that will never be realised.

The debtor - finding himself "sold" for five years or more to his bank - feels the additional pressures yet again of the possibility of taking out another five year loan - even before his first loan is paid back. What will be then?! Faced with a lack of Gemach organisations - Jewish organisations offering interest free loans - he can only turn to banks - often finding himself with additional questions related to loaning from and paying interest to a Jew - something forbidden by the Torah. But with no choice left in his life and nobody to turn to he must hope that at the very least, he will not transgress this prohibition in his life.

The Jewish holidays approach. Another Sukkah must be purchased because the wind may well have destroyed his old one a year before. New Schach must be purchased.  A new Lulav and Etrog. How will he afford these things?! His Tallit is turning brown from use - even dry cleaning won't help. His Mezuzot need checking, his Tefillin need checking.

But with all this, he forgets - he will need to eat. There are still medical expenses - even for necessary check ups. There is clothing he may need - new shoes - just like we all do. Any monies he could possibly save for anything, must be paid to the loan sharks (most likely banks today,) with huge interest fees - and it just keeps adding up - just like the Torah teaches - charging interest is like the bite of a snake. At first one does not realise the bite has occurred. But little by little, the venom increases, the poison enters and before long, there is no way to stop the build up. There is just no way out!

The world goes around. Many with huge resources continue a life of luxury ignoring the tremendous lack of homeostasis those without must confront every day of their lives. When will it end for them(?) - is a wish they long for every single day.

The debt runs into the tens of thousands - and sometimes more. How will it ever be possible to get out of it? Being involved in Tzedakah, I have seen people come through in amounts that have overwhelmed me. When I grew up, I never believed that some people will help - I mean really help! But in the years I have worked in Chessed Ve'Emet, I have seen these things with my own eyes. I call these people "miracle makers." In nature, the poor man is stuck with poverty. He will remain in debt forever. But here - a man /woman - not necessarily "of means" comes through and turns everything around for the poor man. A sizable donation sets things right giving the poor man an opportunity at life again. Giving him the possibility to purchase equipment he may need to start his own life in earning a respectable livelihood again. It is like a miracle has occurred! The air can be breathed again. The miracle maker comes through and saves the day!

Miracle makers: People who identify with that debt, that feeling of hopelessness of the other, lost in a world that judges and moves about because of one thing only - money. These people take hold of the easily available tools of modern technology today - and with just a few clicks - from any part in the world - enter a magic number. A transformational number - which can turn the life of a person so totally lost of hope - into a person who can restart and readjust to getting their life back on track again - not because they ever did anything intentional and criminal to deserve it - but just because that is where they are at.

The years have passed on. The debt is just too big. It's not getting any better.

If it's a Jewish holiday that inspires you to give, the feeling that you've helped another, the assurance that charity will protect you in this world - and give blessing in the next, please consider giving generously by selecting an amount that you can afford and clicking the Buy Now button below. Do it now - and make a difference in the life of another - someone maybe quite desperate. Become a miracle maker - yourself.

For further information on the activities of our organisation Chessed Ve'Emet, see www.lovingkindness.co or contact Reb Eliyahu directly.

Get Out of Debt and Live Again

2 Chai ₪36.00 ILS 10 Chai ₪180.00 ILS 20 Chai ₪360.00 ILS 30 Chai ₪540.00 ILS 40 Chai ₪720.00 ILS 50 Chai ₪900.00 ILS 60 Chai ₪1,080.00 ILS 100 Chai ₪1,800.00 ILS 200 Chai ₪3,600.00 ILS 500 Chai ₪9,000.00 ILS

What Would You Do?: Assist a Woman to Buy Groceries (Video Included)

She stands in line, ready to make a purchase. She has a family to feed - a baby in need of baby food, diapers and - well, everything a baby needs! She doesn't have the money for it all (let alone to imagine how she will pay her rent and taxes!) What would you do? Would you help?

This beautiful video shows a group of very special people who, when put to the test showed their true colours! Indeed, when one sees someone struggling financially - no matter what - if one is able to assist, the Torah teaches we should go all out for them. Of course, if one can't assist, a man in this video shows us another set of true colours - feeling empathetic rather than shouting out insults is also something special. Both take doing. So next time you're solicited for funds from someone who seems to look quite healthy - but going through hard times, consider this video. 

Remember, there is a Creator over all things who is ultimately putting each one of us through this test - every single day, even when we think we're not being watched. One day, however, the Creator will reveal Himself. Out comes the cameras and one is suddenly aware of the test that one had gone through. There's a "Crew" watching us in every situation just wanting and waiting to see the best sides of ourselves - constantly. Are you showing yours? If you can - help. If you can't - feel the other's pain as if it were your own. It may once have been your own too, that's why it should encourage you to give now - if you can! It's important to feel. And if you've never "been there", pay it forwards to others today - so that you may always be blessed. Life is a wheel that goes around.

The Best Ways of Ever Giving Charity: Two Awesome Videos

Everyone knows that giving charity is one of life's major tests. It's not always easy to give even when we have the best of intentions. But there are always times we do want to give. We want to make the difference in another's life - especially when we know just how much they need help. Everybody needs help - at some point in time. It's always good - as they say - to pay it forwards.

I had seen the video below a few weeks ago and it caught my attention. The Rambam lists 8 levels of charity. The highest when we help someone get a job, employ him (and pay him WELL,) support his activities, give him a loan, refer others to him etc. etc. The list continues with aspects concerning the giver and recipient and which of the parties is aware that the other is involved in the transaction. The lowest level is giving even when one does so begrudgingly.

Here's a quick story of someone who wanted to give to others without embarrassing them:

A wealthy man once wanted to make sure that the poor of his town were taken care of. He did not want to embarrass them with his gifts. What did he do? He had a company ship over a quantity of bricks to his home and instructed them to place the bricks on his front lawn. He then called up the first needy man and told him he had a problem! He was in need of the bricks - but in his backyard! He would pay him $200 if he could move the bricks there so that he could continue with some work. What a pleasure - thought the poor man. Just a couple of hours later, it was all done - and he was $200 richer!

The wealthy man then called another of the poor in town. He explained to him that some bricks had been delivered and placed in the backyard. He needed them on the front lawn. He would pay him well - $200 if he could help. The poor man was only too happy! In just a couple of hours the bricks were on the front lawn - and this poor man - like the other, was already $200 richer!

And so the wealthy man continued - assisting in this same way - for all the poor in town.

Giving is something we can all do to help another. We can do it even without embarrassing them! There's always a way to make it happen!

In our video, a man does the same thing - making one in-need "wealthy" without causing any embarrassment! (Surely he would have found out later - but this is not the point. At the time it was happening, the man in need had no idea what was planned.) We should watch and learn - that giving in ways that do not cause embarrassment to the other are indeed ranked in the highest of levels of charity.

It was the follow up to this story that blew me away the most! You'll have to watch it to believe it. Those who saw the act of kindness, were so encouraged, so taken in by the good deed, that they also wanted a part. They also wanted to help this homeless man. They did so by donating generously! So much money came in that they were able to purchase a home for the homeless man (see the deal in the video) and assist him with some very fine furnishings! This is indeed an aspect of the highest level of charity.

Chessed Ve'Emet is also involved in assisting those who lack, to be able to own their own home items, including furniture, appliances and other necessities - all brand new! Our dream is to be able to assist those lacking to be able - very much like this man - to own their very own homes. Any time one is involved in showing others the importance of giving to the highest extent possible creates a great Kiddush Hashem - a sanctification of the Name of G-d. Likewise we can well imagine what discouraging others from performing such acts of kindness can do, let alone showing up the true lack of value they have for another. We really do need to watch videos like this and see that even amongst the nations of the world, there are those who value the honour of another and wish for their very best - nothing less than the best! Imagine how much more beautiful this world would be, if instead of always thinking that the other could get by on the street, we would think of how to assist them to live in dignity and honour!

For those wanting to learn more of our activities, see our main page: Bayit Chadash - Wedding Project - assisting orphans to marry in dignity.

This video is extremely powerful! May we learn to perform acts of kindness in similar ways and give wherever we can to those in need.

Help the Donkey - Before it's too Late!

This week's Parsha - Parshat Behar, contains a selection of exceptionally powerful principles on the topic of kindness, charity and honesty (even if the verses seem to be somewhat mixed within a variety of other important Torah areas.)

The verse teaches (Leviticus 25:35), "If your brother becomes impoverished and his means falter in your proximity, you shall strengthen him... so that he can live with you." This is perhaps one of the most powerful verses in the Torah discussing the Mitzvah of Tzedakah - charity. But what does this have to do with helping a donkey?

Rashi teaches us a vital lesson, as he states regarding this verse: The verse does not use the expression, 'and you shall stand him up" but rather, 'you shall strengthen him.' This is because the verse is teaching us regarding the situation of a person who has not fallen yet. He is still standing (so to speak). But the verse comes to warn one - don't let him descend further and fall completely, because if that happens, it will be most difficult to stand him up again! Rather - the verse teaches - strengthen him now - from the moment he stretches out his hand (the literal translation of the verse) before he falls. This is like a person who is about to fall and his hand stretches out (as if he is hoping to catch something to steady himself and save himself from falling.)

Rashi explains: What is this compared to? To a donkey with a load on it which is now becoming unsteady and about to fall onto the ground. If the load is still upon the donkey, a person can hold onto it and steady it and stand it back to its place. However, if it has already fallen onto the ground, then even five men will be unable to stand it up again! So too here, support the poor person and strengthen him in order to prevent him from falling.

The message is clear. The giving of charity is something done best the moment the poor person asks. All too often we make our own accounts in our heads that a person looks okay - they surely are not in need (even though they are asking.) We give them ideas for new projects that will "surely" make them wealthy. We already know them so well that it simply can't be that the truth is as they say - that they have no money and that they are unable to continue living the way they are any longer. Others choose not to believe that the other is actually desperate and in great need of money - to live.

We make up things that they will be able to make it through. We even think to ourselves - that if we ever will see them fall completely that then we will help them. All sorts of accounts in our own heads - just as long as we don't have to come through to help them. Whether it's their need for food, clothing or shelter or other necessary things in life, we imagine to ourselves how the other will surely manage. And if not... then we will take care of them. But for now - we're exempt. They will turn out just fine!

Our verse teaches us different. The time to help is when the hand of the poor person is stretched out. His stretching out his hand to us, is his way of telling us that he is about to fall - just like a person who is literally about to fall and sticks out his hand ready to grasp anything that will steady him again.

The verse warns -- but if you wait and think that there will be another time that you can help - when you see the other (in your eyes) as really needing, at that time, it may already be too late. The donkey will have fallen with it's load. And whereas the help given just moments before would have steadied the person again, giving him hope to continue, now, not even five men will be able to do the job of assisting this person back onto their feet again. The humiliation they will now have to go through... The fact that they had to sell their most sentimental items (just to get by - and will never be able to get back again)... The total embarrassment they will have to experience as the entire community now begin their talking about the latest poor fellow who they must help - Nebach! The shame. Nothing will ever help to regain the person who once was - who he was before the fall.

We must think of the donkey every time a poor person asks for help - of any kind. It will be a tragedy for us all if it falls. It may even be impossible to ever lift them up again - even with a group of the strongest of men!

The Rambam teaches that the highest level of charity is to prevent a person from becoming poor by offering a loan or employment (honest - where the employee is paid so that he can live with the income he receives!) investing in his business or any other assistance that will avoid the poverty he finds himself in. Let us never forget that powerful teaching from the Rambam - because it is through acts of kindness - of genuine caring and concern for the other, doing everything we can to help them to live - just like us - that will hasten to repair the world, bringing true happiness to all. 

May it always be that that person - who once lacked - live with us - with all the necessities and luxuries we desire and expect for ourselves.

Being Saved - When at the Very Bottom of the Sea (with video clip)

Not everyone experiences life under the sea. Let alone to be stranded there - for days on end with no clothing, no food and no water (save for the sea water of course!) and then be able to miraculously swim back to safety to find air, food, water, clothing and life again! 

Though most will never relate to such an episode - there are indeed many who face this very situation while living on the land itself. They look around them at millions of people who seem to be going about life quite "healthily" - but at the end of each day find themselves with nothing. The situation can become desperate! Those on the outside, watching the "nebach" of society, are often quick to condemn and insult one who has fallen on hard times. Many will share their most knowledgeable opinions about why things have turned out that way for someone. "He didn't work hard," they may say. Or alternatively, "If only he wouldn't be so lazy," is offered as a plausible reason as to his current hard times. Others will offer, "If he would only have studied medicine in university as we told him to..." as the reason for the person's current woes.

But when one is stranded... when one is actually there... all the insults in the world do nothing to alleviate the suffering. Our duty is to help where we can, not to insult - just as much as it is the duty of the doctor to heal (and to do everything possible to heal!) and not to predict bad tidings which may well never happen.

Harrison Okene could well understand those words, because when he found himself on a ship almost a year ago, his fate would take on a similar story. Well qualified in hotel management and catering - he was a chef (though he calls himself merely a cook!) Yet when his ship was toppled over by the powerful seas that fateful day, even his greatest skills at cooking a cuisine of the very best flavours and spices would do nothing to save his life. The ship of which he was a part of the crew, sunk hard with 10 out of the 12 crew losing their lives and another never to be found. He was the lucky one - to survive. It seems, miraculously, an air bubble formed in the particular area of the ship he had escaped to and wearing just his boxer shorts, he remained seated hoping, praying and simply wishing someone would rescue him. What else could he do? Trying to find a job at that location wouldn't offer the assistance he needed then. All those stories about working hard for his living and taking care of himself didn't account for much. Finding himself at rock bottom (literally!) meant all he had left in his life was the hope that another would take care of him.

And so he waited. He ate nothing for three days. Somehow his body dealt with the extreme cold under the sea. What more could he do? Suddenly a hand appeared from nowhere. Miraculously (again!) he noticed it coming through and grabbed it. He could well have been asleep, but miraculously he was awake to see it - and he grabbed it. The rescue team realised there was someone still alive. The rest - as they say - is history.

The team took the greatest of care to save his life. There was no criticism for his having chosen chef-school as his means of earning a living - nor that he had decided to pursue his career on a ship (of all places!) in the dangerous area of the seas. Instead was the care and compassion of a team of people prepared to save someone in trouble - someone who was literally sinking! To save - because that's what needed to be done!

They explained exactly how they would help him - because that's what he needed! They even tied an "umbilical" to him so that they would hold onto him throughout the entire process. (Imagine the kindness of people prepared to construct an artificial cord to one in need today - when most so much want to keep away from assisting the one in need - telling them it's for their own good!) They explained to him what he needed to do. They gave him the oxygen he needed to stay alive while under water. They brought him up to ground level - safely, making sure that decompression was attended to correctly so as not to cause additional problems.

It's amazing what one can learn about how to give charity today - just from a story about a man who found himself sinking on a ship! But it's true - when one learns from all things in life, one can take these lessons seriously enough to realise that saving a (well qualified) man who has sunk in the sea, is really not that much different than saving any person who is struggling in life. That person too is currently helpless, and having reached his particular station in life, can do little more than to sit out and wait for a hand to come through, and pull one up to safety - all the while caring and sharing what will be happening until the other is on level ground again. That's what Tzeddakah - charity - is really all about. It's the one Mitzvah that acknowledges another person's needs and desires - as much as one acknowledges the needs of oneself. No wonder the Torah says - it is in this merit that the final Redemption will be hastened! 

We invite all who value the Mitzvah of Tzedakkah to take part in assisting some very special people who live their lives at rock bottom level on a daily basis to visit our Bayit Chadash Project - and to give them a chance to start life in dignity.

Enjoy the video! The actual rescue starts at about 5:50.

The Rebbe on Autism (Video Clip)

Purpose of Technology (Video of the Rebbe of Lubavitch)

Pesach - A Time to Give. Four Cups of Milk! (Video Clip of the Lubavitcher Rebbe Included)

One of the Mitzvot preceding Pesach is the Mitzvah of "Kimcha DePischa" - or "Pesach Flour." The Mitzvah includes not only the giving of charity for the sake of flour - so that the poor can have Matzah on Pesach, but also the much needed charity to allow others in need to be able to celebrate the festival with joy. Without life's most basic necessities such as food, clothing and shelter, most individuals find it difficult to celebrate a festival like Pesach with joy (or to celebrate any part of life for that matter!) 

We offer you the opportunity to enjoy a video clip of the Lubavitcher Rebbe speaking about the great value of giving at this time of year, and then the additional opportunity to make an actual difference in the lives of some families living in Israel in actual need of food, clothing and other - to make their Pesach one filled with joy.

We hope you'll be a part of it - helping another to feel the true freedom that Pesach gives each of us - and in return that you too should be blessed with a Pesach that brings you the freedom you need in all of your own life's trials.

You can donate by simply clicking on the donate button below, or alternatively by visiting the "Bayit Chadash - Wedding Project" and learning more about our assisting newly married couples to be able to set up their own homes together without the additional crisis of having to deal with financial worries at the very start of their marriage. Should you wish to find our more, all contact information is available on those pages. Remember, though the Bayit Chadash project is about helping couples to marry - this also includes setting up their home - and giving them the opportunity to pay for their most basic expenses - such as the Pesach Seder and more - as they build their Bayit Ne'eman Be'Yisrael.

Enjoy the video!

FOUR CUPS OF MILK?!

One of the Mitzvot at the Seder is to drink four cups of wine. It happened one eve of Pesach, that Rabbi Chaim of Brisk heard a knocking at his door. He opened the door to find a poor man who had a Halachic question to ask of the great rabbi. "Rabbi," said the man, "Can one fulfill one's obligation for the four cups - by drinking four cups of milk?" Rabbi Chaim thought for a few moments... He then turned to his wife and asked her for five rubles which he immediately gave to the poor man and wished him a happy Pesach!

After leaving, the rabbi's wife asked him why he had given the poor man such a large sum of money. In fact, he had only wanted to know if he could fulfill his obligation by drinking four cups of milk! In any case, even one ruble would have sufficed for providing the man with wine throughout the entire Pesach holiday! Rabbi Chaim replied, "Since the man is asking about fulfilling his obligation on wine, he had hinted to two things. The first was the fact that he could not afford the wine. The second - which required a little more concern and thought - was that he had asked about fulfilling his obligation on milk. Surely - if he had asked about milk, he also lacked the money to purchase meat (which would have been forbidden to eat together with the milk!)" Rabbi Chaim had heard a question that was not being asked. He had heard the other asking for something needed - but for the additional embarrassment of asking - was avoided! 

We so often see others asking for assistance etc. and even in their asking, they seem to require just a little something basic. To such a degree that we feel we can even discharge our obligation to give by giving just that small amount necessary.

But it takes a sensitive soul to hear the true words of the one asking for "flour for Pesach." Surely, if they are lacking the means to own flour, they may also lack the means to own beautiful new garments for the festival. They may even be in need of a fridge to store their food. They may lack a stove upon which to cook. And who knows... they may even lack their own home to eat in...

Kimcha D'Pischa - teaches us the true meaning of sensitivity. When we give, we let the other know that the money is there to help them buy Matzot. But what we really mean to say is - "Here... take this wealth and see to it that you have meat too. See to it that you and your family have brand new clothing... See to it to buy that fridge that you've never been able to afford. See to it to purchase a stove so you can have hot food! See to it that you own a home so that you can eat your meal inside of it - like a king and queen!"

Pesach is the time for our freedom. A time to turn to each other and love the other truly as we would love ourselves - desiring for other the same freedom in life as we strive for ourselves.

Go on... Take it with a Pinch of Salt (Parshat Vayera.)

This weeks Parsha – Vayera – relates the famous story of the city of Sodom as it is turned completely upside down and burnt in every which way one can think of. What lead to its demise? 

We are taught that the city of Sodom was a most unscrupulous city! It simply had no values. The type of people living there however, were certainly well off! To live in the city of Sodom – one had to be on the very top of the Wealthiest of the World list. Sodom was all about the good things in this physical world – and if you wanted to be a part of it – you had to bring your own things with you.

There was no such thing as giving anybody anything in a city filled with the millionaires of that day. There was no reason to give to anybody. Everybody already had! And nobody thought twice that there could ever be a situation that somebody didn't! If one would dare to enter the city with a lack of funds, one would be thrown out immediately at best – and killed at worst. Sodom did not want poverty. In fact, it didn't even want to know that such a thing existed. Life – for those of the world of Sodom – was all about enjoying the luxuries of the physical world – without a thought that there might be anything or anyone else on this planet experiencing the slightest tinge of suffering!

Lot – the nephew of Avraham – and his wife on the other hand had obviously learnt a little about the act of kindness, and it seems that they were ready to help – so long as nobody else knew about it! But why did the entire city of Sodom deserve its most ignoble fate?

"The world is built on kindness" – says King David (Psalms 89:3). G-d built a world of give and take. It was His desire that there should be givers and takers. After all, G-d Himself is the ultimate Giver and we – human beings (and other creatures too) the ultimate Receivers. We have nothing we can give to G-d. We can only take. How embarrassing for any human being to consider then the idea that he choose never to give to another because they are poor! How embarrassing – when after all, even he has nothing – without the kind grace of G-d!

Sodom was not destroyed because it was up to no good. It was destroyed because it already had no existence! After all, if it was a city that could not abide by the law of the world – Kindness – the Law of Giving – the law of building the world – the very foundation of life – then it had no existence of its own in any case. The physical manifestation of a city going up in smoke, was no more than the reality of showing the world the true spiritual essence of the city. A city that has crumbled spiritually – is also a city that has crumbled physically. The physical occurrence was merely the reality of what the city was already in a spiritual sense. It had no life. It was not a part of it. Life is about kindness. The world continues to exist because of kindness. A city that does not abide by such a "law" is obviously not a part of this world at all! Demolition to such a city can hardly be considered anything more than a showing up of the reality of its "life."

The strong contrast of life in the city of Sodom against life today, points clearly to the low moral life system which the barbarians of the Bible era lived vis-à-vis ourselves. Today, those with wealth are sharing it with the world. Nobody is left homeless or without food. All are – thank G-d – clothed and continually feeling the kindnesses of those who have been blessed materially in abundance! In stark contrast to that city of Sodom, the world of today has learned about moral values. It seems that in today's times even those with wealth want others to share the same luxuries they have – whether it's fancy cars, large yachts (and all the parties that go on them too) – or whether it's owning a mansion in every country. What types of lessons could the civilized of today ever learn from those barbarians who lived in the times of Sodom?!

One might wonder why it was that Lot's wife was stricken with a death sentence that ended up turning her into a pillar of salt! Perhaps an insight into her ignoble death may help us in understanding the similarities (if we can stretch ourselves to see them) between the city of Sodom and the world which we live in today!

The Torah teaches us that, as things turned out, visitors would (try to) frequent the area for assistance. Some – apparently had the chutzpah – to ask for a pinch of salt (perhaps even just a grain!) The Torah doesn't tell us about everyone's reaction to these terrible crimes of the city of Sodom. It does however tell us that Lot's wife refused to part with her own share of this rare delicacy! 

A brief consideration of the condiment salt will make us aware that though much food can be eaten without any necessary toppings, salt does have a way of bringing out the extra taste hidden inside the food. It's not a necessity – granted! But it's much appreciated and makes all the difference of the concept between eating to live – or living to eat! Call it a luxury if you must! Our former case speaks of one who will settle for a piece of bread – if it will help in keeping him alive. Our latter case speaks of the person who feels the need to experience some goodness and taste in the world. Though the extreme of this case is certainly a danger – most people in the world need some sort of spice to keep their spirits in life up! Nothing big… just a grain of salt – sometimes!

The "Lot's wives" of the world however think differently about the salt of others – especially the poor. They consider it a tremendous encroachment on their own lives when the poor man asks for something so "large." In fact, one might even find the "Lot's wives" of the world claiming that they too lack this precious and rare commodity – and that is why they cannot give any of it away. If that is not the reason, they will be forthright in explaining to the one who lacks – that while they (the "Lot's wives") do in fact have this grain of salt (to help keep their spirits in life up which they exclusively need – unlike others), they just don't have enough for everyone. Besides… the poor man can do with the piece of bread – even if it doesn't have the flavour the salt adds to it! In this way, a slamming of the door in the face of the poor man is forthright in coming!

We must judge the "Lot's wives" of the world favourably. It could be quite probable that they too lack the grain of salt after all. It could even be that they don't have enough. (It may after all actually belong to their banks!) And perhaps after all – the poor simply do not need the same sophisticated lifestyle as the wealthy.

With fire and brimstone (literally) G-d turns the entire city upside down. For some reason – perhaps because of their better Middot (character traits), G-d saves Lot and his family – on condition that nobody looks back at the city they once came from. It is not for those who have actually taken part in the criminal activities of a city to be given the right to see its destruction if they have been granted immunity as a gift!

Sadly Lot's wife turns around and is immediately turned into a pillar of salt. Not a pinch and not even a grain… an entire pillar. The reason is clear. This is truly what she was. Her very essence contained nothing less than the desire for the absolute good things in life – and she had plenty of it. (It didn't belong to the bank after all!) In fact, not only this, but she had so much of it – that there was enough to give to everybody who asked her. Many must have come through asking for help. But they were turned away. The "Lot's wives" of the world understand that it's not the question of having or not… there is indeed plenty to give. It's just a question of concealing it from others that counts most.

Of course, those that tread this path of concealment must understand that one day things might truly be turned upside down, and instead of everything looking just right, one might find oneself turned into a pillar of salt for everyone to see. It will be clear then, that all the things that were constantly spoken about as being lacking – were actually there. The only concealment taking place was in the form of a lie!

What was wrong with Sodom?! Let alone parting with a grain of salt, they would steal – everything and anything from someone who already had nothing! But in particular they did it with cunning. Amazingly the entire city would rob a man walking through – with each person taking just a Perutah – one cent away from him. In this way, the courts could not prosecute anyone since theoretically no real crime had been committed. After all, would any judge today judge monetary cases of a victim claiming someone had stolen a cent from him?!

But G-d could not tolerate such behaviour. It is the very essence of the breaking up of society. When those who have are able to take – even that little extra small amount from those who don't – and still claim honesty… this is a city deserving of destruction. It is not because of a small crime. It is because the very purpose of the world has been lost. The kindness upon which the world is built has been destroyed. The "thief" is prepared to take even a cent that doesn't truly belong to him. And the victim must part with it without being able to cry over his loss – because nobody will listen!

Today's stores sell goods at 3.99 "Bob" or even 3.98 in order to attract attention. When one arrives at the till to ring it up, the cashier will charge 4 Bob without giving change. Of course the marketing manager for the goods is happy to stick the price tag with the cheaper amount displayed to give the impression that the item is cheaper, but the finance manager is required to collect that little extra – even though it is not actually written anywhere. Many times the final amount of goods will come to an amount ending in a 5 e.g. 3.95 Bob. When the purchaser pays his 4 Bob – he may never receive his 5 Bob change – for a lack of 5 Bob coins. The owner of the store once again comes away with an extra 5 Bob for every single purchase – amounts adding up to hundreds of thousands of extra dollars during the year! But does the 5 Bob actually count – and is there any theft involved?! Many stores will not include a price – or even tell you one, until the item is rung up – forcing one to pay whatever the cost.

And yet others will claim that while their regular price is ten times as much – it has been brought down now as a discount just for you! When these statements are said without any proof – they too fit into the category of theft. Of course, nobody can ever sue those involved in such transactions because the crime is far too small to warrant any court and judge setting up time to deal with such petty instances in life. In fact, even one's own friends might laugh at one's feelings of dissatisfaction at those making up statements regarding their charge of service or product… Yet the buyer may well feel the pain – immensely!

The bus driver may clip an extra ticket "by mistake." There is never anyone to complain to, but the purchaser must pay. It's only a few Bob… get another ticket!

Was it only the Sodomites who knew about petty theft that never hurt anyone?! Was it only the Sodomites who understood that the wealthy have no obligation to help the poor? Was it only the Sodomites who "didn't really have"? Or do we find that perhaps there still are some in today's world who have modelled the character traits of the Sodomites down to a "T".

Perhaps it is time to revisit the story of Sodom. To revisit the life (and lifestyle) of Lot's wife. To examine if perhaps we can find anything in it that may resemble something of life today. And then – to take a true accounting of ourselves to see whether we can appreciate the real needs of the other – to see our lives for the blessings we have and what more we can do to make sure the other is able to live their life as wonderfully and with all the physical blessings that we live our own. Perhaps we need to learn more about what real honesty is - and what real theft is. Perhaps we need to learn the laws of business, the laws of kindness and the laws of caring for another.

We are All Beggars

The Chofetz Chaim – Rabbi Yisrael Meir HaKohen Kagan (1839-1933) wrote some of the most well read works in Jewish law today. His Mishna Berurah – a commentary on the first section of the Code of Jewish law – the Shulchan Aruch – is accepted as being one of the most studied works in regular Yeshiva life today. In today's times, when it comes to understanding day-to-day Halachah, it is to the Mishna Berurah that we turn.

In addition to this masterpiece, the Chofetz Chaim wrote additional authoritative books, including a work encompassing all the laws of forbidden speech taken from the entire Talmud (and other works) – entitled "Chofetz Chaim" and a work encompassing the entire gamut of Midrash related material sharing the beauty as to the importance of observing these laws of forbidden speech – entitled "Shemirat HaLashon."

There is however another beautiful work that is in need of much study. "Ahavat Chessed" is the Chofetz Chaim's summary of the laws of kindness towards a fellow Jew. He takes one from the laws of loaning money to simply dealing with what kindness is all about. Of course all these books mentioned above are in need of study on a regular basis, and in fact there are structured programs allowing one to finish studying them every single year (and so should they be!)

At the very beginning of his second section of the book, the Chofetz Chaim awakens us into appreciating a fact that most of us never really think about. 

Let's first put ourselves in our own shoes as we hear that knock at the door… We all know the feelings we get on seeing a "beggar" at the door. Thousands of thoughts fill our heads immediately as we begin to come up with excuses as to why not to give. "Why can't he get a regular job?" or perhaps, "Why can't he manage to live on less?!" Then we think up such things as, "Why must *I* always be the person to help when others have so much more than I do?" We even go so far as to perhaps recommending an entire plan of action as to how he/she should live his/her life and actually tell them to their faces – often with a most unwelcome slamming of the door in their faces.

It seems we're all authorities when it comes to the financial lives of others, knowing exactly how they should be living (and when they're demanding too much from us wanting more than their due!) We often know where they should go to shop for cheaper things. We can often give them tens of phone numbers to call of people who "can help." In short, we much prefer telling others off and making them clearly aware that as for ourselves, we're all taken care of! Now… it's up to them to "get a life" and stop becoming burdens on society!

But are we really all taken care of?! Even the most wealthy?! Are they really as independent as they think they are? Or is it maybe – somewhere possible to imagine that just like this beggar – they too are beggars in their own lives?! Perhaps the man at the door is simply a little worse off. But when it comes to real life, we are all in fact in exactly the same boat.

And so the Chofetz Chaim comes in to tell us the truth of each of our lives. In fact, loving kindness is an attribute we all best take to heart – immediately. The reason? We all need it! Every single one of us. The poorest of the poor, is in reality – no less independent than the wealthiest of the wealthy. Though the false illusion appears to distract us from the reality, every single one of us is in need of someone else, of something!

When G-d created man, He created him in His own image. But what exactly is the image of G-d?! G-d is the very Essence of good – of kindness, of the aspect of giving. If there is one trait clearly visible it is the fact that He gives. "G-d is good to all" (Psalms 145:9) and, "He gives bread to all flesh – for His kindness is everlasting" (Psalms 136:25). 

The world around us, nature, people, everything – it is all something that G-d has brought about – for us. To be created in His image is to be built with the quality of kindness, of giving. To push this aspect of ourselves aside – ever – is to remove (at least at that moment in time when it is actually needed) the image of G-d that has been imprinted into each one of us. Our very being is about doing an act of kindness to another. The entire world exists – only because of kindness. As King David teaches, "The world is built upon kindness" (Psalms 89:3)

In fact, the entire world exists solely on acts of kindness – nothing else! Every day, every moment, every person and every thing – exists solely because of some force of kindness that is acting upon it at that point in time. Even the wealthiest cannot exist without a constant force of kindness acting upon them (though they not even be aware of it!)

The Chofetz Chaim points out regarding the well known story of Sodom and Gemorrah. Here was a self-sufficient town filled with only the wealthiest of the wealthy. In fact the entire area was sealed off – except to those who already had wealth. The poor man would not dare to enter – lest he be killed. Poverty was not for these cities. Anybody entering the city in the hope of someone else giving him wealth – may just as well have entered an inferno!

Sodom and Gemorrah had absolutely no need to interact with any other city in the entire world. It was completely self-sufficient. There would never be any need for political fighting of any kind – because they kept solely to themselves. They neither took from anyone (having everything already!) nor did they give to anyone. They simply existed on their own… It was *this* very thing that lead G-d to destroy the city. It was a city that could not exist, because to put it simply – there was no kindness. Nobody was willing to give to anyone. Everyone felt that they already had, and therefore had no need to give to another. This is not G-dly. This is not the Divine Will of this world. This is the antithesis of what G-d wants – a world filled with kindness – with everyone continually giving to everyone else!

Today, there is no longer a trace of those cities. They could have no existence today – because they never had any existence – even then!

Let's now view our own lives for just a moment. As we do so, we will see that there is not a moment that goes by without us needing the assistance of another (and hence why solitary confinement is such a superb punishment to make the greatest of the great go absolutely mad!) 

Of course, we can always turn our heads up at the beggar who "begs" for help. We can tell him how he should live his life – and stop depending on society with such burdens! Or we can realise, we are no different…

Every person goes through a variety of life experiences. To each experience, he will need assistance. Sometimes, one needs the financial help of a friend. Even the wealthy require financial help. Many times they wish to expand multi-million dollar businesses and must consult with big loan companies in order to acquire the finance they need to become even bigger. But do they ever consider this to be a form of begging – after all they are wealthy enough as it is?!"

Sometimes a person needs the help of another to find work. And even when wealthy – if work does not constantly come through (if clients do not constantly come through) the wealthy man will become poor… soon! Here lies the positive Mitzvah of, "And you shall strengthen him… and he should live *with* you" (Leviticus 25:25). Of course, this includes every single person!

Sometimes a person requires the kindness of his friend to help with his bodily needs, for example when he has a Simcha! It won't be much fun if others are not around to enjoy it! What good would a wedding be if there were no guests, no band, no caterers?! Everybody realises then that they must get help from others in order to have their own happiness in life!

When one is sad, one needs the assistance of friends to console him and to speak gently to him. Here we see the Mitzvah of Nichum Aveilim – comforting mourners (for example.) And such a person needs the friendship of others to help cheer him up! 

Sometimes one must travel. Here too one needs the assistance of others. It may be that we need help finding our way around a new place, or assistance in finding out where to eat, the cost of things etc. Often one may even need the assistance of another for directions – or even to find a bathroom in a hurry! Hopefully there will be someone who will help us when we need such things in an emergency situation!

When we are invited as guests, we need the help of the host to make us feel welcome. When one is ill, one needs the help of others – to visit him and to help provide him with his needs, as he may be confined to bed. One can then surely realise just how much we are dependent on others. Even the wealthiest of the wealthy can find themselves confined to bed needing the assistance of those – who lack money, who have barely enough to live on… Yet it is their assistance that he may need. This falls under the commandment of Bikkur Cholim – of visiting the sick.

And when each of us dies, we need the most ultimate kindness of all. The Torah calls this the Kindness of Truth, because it is a kindness to which nobody will ever be repaid. When one dies, one is in need of the assistance of others to see to one's burial. The body will not manage to clean itself and walk to it's grave by itself – and then cover itself with soil. Rather, it will be through the kindness of others that after death, a person's body will be dealt with honourably until the last mound of dust is placed upon it.

The short of it is that the world would cease to exist were it not for the attribute of kindness. Were it not for kindness, none of us would be able to get through life – because it is through the constant kindness of others that we are fortunate enough to manage to get through our lives and obtain the things we need. Not even the wealthiest man in the world would be able to attain all these things with just his wealth alone.

And therefore, when we encounter a man who asks for nothing more than just some money to live – we should do well to consider how life is made up of continual kindnesses. Today, he is in need of the kindness of wealth (no matter how much!) Tomorrow, the giver of that money may be in need of assistance as he lies in bed. And who knows? The next day, the "beggar" may be the very person who takes care of, and buries the wealthy man… But will the wealthy man then feel disgust towards his "intruder" the previous day?!

Our obligation is to strengthen ourselves tremendously in this awesome attribute. Our obligation is to realise that even if we are doing fine in terms of wealth – we are all in essence "beggars".

Of course, the real beggars can find out for themselves if they ever feel that way. As we stand in Shul on the holy day of Yom Kippur – a day filled with prayer, repentance – and forgiveness, we realise that actually, without the kindness of G-d, we are truly nothing. At that point in time, as we stand praying, we identify well, that all is in His hands… the wealth we will receive in the coming year, the health… our family life and children… all is in His hands. Will you be asking for something this year?! Might there be a smudge of "begging" going on?! Can it be that we could ever be beggars? Even the most wealthy?!

It can! And if so, we must certainly reflect hard in our hearts back at our thoughts and our speech as we turn to "open the door" each time we encounter another asking for help. As we do so, we realise, we are truly no better than they. Perhaps – they are even greater than we – though they seem to ask us for our help! Perhaps they will help us tomorrow. Who knows, it may be their very kindness that one day ensures each of us is buried honourably and given the respect each of us is truly due. Today he is but a beggar worth nothing… Tomorrow – he is our "life saviour!" let us think twice before slamming the door, before advising him how he should live his life, before demeaning or embarrassing him. We are no different to him. Just that today we are on the inside of that door and he is on the outside. Tomorrow, however, things may be quite different.